The new form of parental torture is homework, in case you missed the memo. Or maybe it’s not new at all. Maybe it’s always been there; it’s just that, before Facebook, there was no way to commiserate. And at least today we have Google it whereas 30 years ago our parents had to know shit so they could answer our questions. Or, more likely, we actually had to figure shit out on our own.
But, parents, I’ve got your back. I’ve created my own personal Homework Hustle Playlist for those times when you just give zero f**ks about whether the homework gets done or even if there is any homework at all. Or maybe you need a good jam for those moments when you’ve either tried the quiet, reasonable approach or yelled until you’re blue in the face. We’ve all been there.
The Homework Hustle Playlist by @ericablogs
Shout – Tears for Fears: For the nights you’ve yelled, “Sit down and finish your homework!” until your throat is raw. (To be fair, you did ask nicely the first 17 times.) Find a quiet space and let it all out.
You Learn – Alanis Morissette: For that moment when you calmly explain to your child the importance of reviewing the day’s lessons, because, “That is how you learn.” And they listen. You score major parenting points for this one.
I Don’t Know Why – Imagine Dragons: When you find yourself questioning Why? I’m not one of those parents who can happily sit on the homework sidelines. Nope. I’m right in there. In the thick of it. Being all involved. Caring that it gets done. Driving myself and everyone around me batshit crazy. Why, tho’?
Livin’ on a Prayer – Bon Jovi: After asking all week, “Got any homework?” only to be met with *crickets*. Then, Sunday night your kid announces he has a presentation due the next day. Which, of course, he hasn’t started. And you pray for every ounce of strength to not lose your everloving shit.
Complicated – Avril Lavigne: Because math. It’s complicated.
Sweet Child O’ Mine – Guns N’ Roses: They did it. They sat and did their homework and you didn’t even have to threaten to sell off their Lego, piece by piece. Not only that, your sweet child curled up beside you and read a book. And it didn’t make you want to rip your ears off! You’ve got this.
Red Red Wine – UB40: When all else fails, pour yourself a glass of red.
We R Who We R – Ke$ha: I wish — I wish — I could be one of those parents who could send that sassy-smart letter to school explaining that neither my kids nor I would be partaking in homework in an effort to have a calm and blissful school year. Because, you guys, this homework thing is seriously cramping our style. But that’s not me. I am who I am.
Alright, your turn. What song would you add to your homework hustle playlist?